Here in Finland, children speaking a secondary language can access free afternoon classes to learn it (one hour a week I believe). However, these classes are organised far from where we live and I heard many parents complaining of their low quality. Part of the issue is that the school groups together children with different language levels. This arrangement didn’t sound effective and worthwhile to me, so I have decided to go solo, at least for now. Since I know that many families around the world struggle with the same challenges, I am sharing what worked for us.

Set goals

It is important to set overall language goals for your children as well as progressive targets. Personally this year I wanted for R to learn to read fluently as well as assimilate few grammar rules. What level of fluency and skill do you want your child to reach? What can you feasibly achieve in few months? Write down a timeline. We used a book with linear structure and chapters, so I leveraged that to set a roadmap for the year. I then complemented the plan with self-made exercise sheets and other books.

Stick to a schedule

Don’t be casual about carving time for this. Schedule a regular time on the calendar and stick to it as much as possible. If it turns out not to be a good time (i.e. the child is too tired or other commitments often jump the line), change it but be consistent. Holidays or social distancing are opportunities to add extra lessons.
Leave some margin in your plan, because a year is a long time and the child’s motivation and commitment might fluctuate.

Motivate with small rewards

Sticker sheets are the way. R gets to apply a sticker a the end of each lesson. For this, it’s important to define what one lesson is: is it a completed chapter? A series of exercises? Is it bound by time?
Every five sticker she can access a prize and the prize size increases over time. Rewards don’t have to be expensive: small toys, candies, a comic book (you see what I’m doing there), a colouring book.

Encourage but don’t force it

Let’s face it, for the child this is extra work. Motivating and encouraging is legit, but understand where the line is. If the child identifies this as a chore, it will be hard to recover. No one likes to be forced to learn! During the year we took breaks as I saw R’s commitment teeter. We started these classes last summer and for instance she was extra tired and stressed when she started preschool. I allowed her to adapt to the new changes and it paid off.

Make it fun

It is not feasible to sit a young child school-style for a hour or so. I alternated formal exercises with videos -Youtube is full of songs and videos on Italian grammar, I found – and small learning games. Examples of games were:
the hangman game;
whenever we studied a chapter on a letter, we had to mime in turns things starting with that letter for the other to guess;
in turns we would name a letter and the other had to find something in the room starting with it as fast as possible.
This motivated R to do her exercises, as she was striving to complete to play with me.
Moreover, this can be fun for parents too! Beside the playing bit, I enjoyed creating personal exercise sheets to complement the books we used.

I hope this is useful to other multilingual families. Do you have more tips or resources to share? Please add them to the comments for my and my readers’ benefit. If this post was interesting or useful, I’d love to hear your feedback as well. Happy learning!

Recommended posts:
Book review of “Be Bilingual”.
Interview to sociologist Soile Pietikäinen on bilingualism in families: part I and part II.

Risorse per genitori italiani

Dato tutto il tempo che ho speso nel ricercare e creare risorse, sono più che felice di condividerle con i miei colleghi genitori.
Un sito fa-vo-lo-so è Fantavolando. Ha una marea di risorse e schede per varie età.
I libri possono essere ordinati da Amazon.it. Quelli che abbiamo utilizzato per il primo anno sono stati:
Il mio primo sillabario di Manuela Duca
Imparo le lettere con il libro lavagna. Questo è carino per imparare la grafia perché si può cancellare e riscrivere ad infinitum.
Imparo a scrivere in stampatello maiuscolo e minuscolo. Esercizi da pre-grafia fino a brevi frasi.
Ho anche creato alcune schede di esercizi e grammatica che sono felice di condividere: scaricale da qui.
Se avete altre risorse o idee, per favore condividetele con me. E fatemi sapere se questi consigli vi sono utili, è sempre bello avere del feedback!

Featured image by Angelina Litvin on Unsplash.

The post Bilingual Kids – Our Experience Teaching a Second Language appeared first on The Elephant Mum.

#1. Bonding

Reading is quality time you spend with your children. It’s about cutting a quiet moment out of a busy day, sitting down, and focusing on interacting with them. For children, attention equals love. Reading together is a fantastic opportunity for connection. My son is a lively boy, yet he is always willing to sit down whenever I offer to read to him. It is a special moment we shared.

#2. Enrich language(s)

No matter if you are a monolingual or a multilingual family, reading is a phenomenal tool to expand your child’s vocabulary. Beside the “classic” illustrated books of words, I make a point of picking books that display as many different situations and contexts as possible: family, school, play, fantasy worlds, animals, and so on. Books introduce children to terms that rarely belong to spoken language. I am very proud of how rich our children’s vocabulary is, and I guarantee that most of the credit goes to all the hours we spent reading together.

#3. Cultivate culture(s)

Children can learn plenty about other cultures from reading and watching illustrations. We have built a good collection of books about India, the minority culture in our family. We regularly read about traditions, festivals, deities, stories, and more. Books can be windows into other countries or cultures.

#4. Teach values

I regularly mine libraries and online stores to find children’s reads that teach our family’s set of values, such as kindness, compassion, diversity, respect for others. I have used books to teach my children how to say no, to respect others’ boundaries, and much more. Personally we are not believers, but books can be a way to introduce the child to the family’s religion(s). I have proof that this works, because my children often comment real life’s situations referring to the stories we read.

#5. Support development milestones

Tales can be a parent’s best friend during challenging times like… potty training. I have used books to help my children give up the pacifier, toilet train, sleep better, calm fears, start daycare, start school… I mean, we ourselves often turn to self-help books to improve our lives, relationships, businesses, so why can’t it be the same for kids?

#6. Educate

I use books to introduce my children to cool subjects like robotics, space, how the human body works. Beside “curricular subjects”, stories have supported also the emotional development of my children (read my top 10 children’s books to explore feelings). Whether you teach life skills or academic knowledge, your children have a lot to gain from books.

Reading is a cornerstone of our family life and a huge superpower for parents. I hope I have convinced you to pick up reading to children as a habit. I recommend you include it in your routine. Choose a moment of the day when you can commit to do it daily, like bedtime or during morning commute. I promise, you will not go back.

The post 6 Reasons Why Reading to Children is a Parent’s Superpower appeared first on The Elephant Mum.

Is my vulnerability as a foreigner cutting opportunities for my children?

The post Anxieties Of An Immigrant Parent appeared first on The Elephant Mum.

A foreword on Scandinavian societies

Scandinavian societies are cool because they are founded on the value of equality. However, there’s a dark side to it: different and stranger become synonyms with bad. Individualism, may it be in the form of personal success or struggle, is generally despised. Entire books have been written on the topic (see for example The Almost Nearly Perfect People by Michael Booth) and here I’m only trying to give a rough idea of how things are. It doesn’t help that Finland is a relatively young and small country, kept together by a mild nationalistic sentiment. We, as foreigners, start off with the wrong foot in this country by definition. As of 2019, integration plans still aim to annihilate diversity and make foreigners melt into the homogeneous Finnish society. This is why you yourself have to be extremely aware of what your needs are and make informed choices. Diversity is simply not a value in Finnish society.

Define your own integration goals

Moving to a new country is stressful and many expats are in a rush to find a job. However, it pays off to take a moment to collect the facts and evaluate one’s decisions when it comes to deciding an integration path. There are several weights influencing the decision to learn Finnish language. In 9 years in Finland I have identified some.

Language level: people often talk about language learning like it’s a binary experience, either you know a language or you don’t. The reality is that language is multidimensional and tied to different contexts, vocabulary, writing skills, speaking and listening abilities. Try to imagine your life in Finland and assess what you will need language for. Do you need to understand mostly what’s going on in everyday life or you want to learn to read newspapers? Do you need Finnish for work or in your social life? Set your objectives, that’s a crucial first step.
Location: while the Helsinki area is international and liberal, other towns are not. If you live away from the capital area, probably you don’t have much of a choice than to learn Finnish.
Mobility: how long do you plan to be in Finland? Learning the local language takes years. My rule of thumb is not to engage if you plan to stay less than 6 years in Finland.
Work: what field would you like to work in? Some careers can be built with no Finnish knowledge (ex. IT), but in others you cannot do without (ex. hospitality, architects, …).
Resources: as mentioned above, learning Finnish is potentially a years-long affair, unless you have a personal talent for languages. To give you an idea, I could speak my first sentence after a year and a half of courses. Finnish grammar is hell. Are you ready to commit to time and money?
Social life: what kind of social life do you see yourself having? What are your hobbies and is Finnish language needed?
Active participation in society: is being up to date on news and having an active role in society important to you? If so, reading newspapers and debating would require fluent Finnish.

Finnish language and parenting

In the previous section, I have listed variables having to do with you as an individual. Parenting a child in Finland adds another dimension and a set of new angles.
A Finnish spouse: if your spouse is Finnish, knowing their native language could mean having a more active role in family interactions. Finnish could potentially become the shared family language (but don’t stop speaking your minority language with your child!).
You child’s social life: if your child is learning Finnish, it means she will have a circle of local friends. Knowing the basics allows you to interact with other parents at the daycare or school, feel confident when little friends visit for playdates, etc.
School interaction: I have only experience with daycare so far, but from what I have heard school-parent communications intensify in volume and content complexity when a child starts school. Not everything is translated into English and in some social occasions (ex. parents’ meetings or Whatsapp groups) the information flow will be solely in Finnish. If you have a Finnish spouse, no problemo. If you don’t, evaluate how involved you wish to be in your child’s school life. Put it down like that, it sounds like a leading phrase, but if you are one of those parents who’d rather die than be sucked into the school parents’ ecosystem, being a foreigner may become your Get Out of Jail Free card.

Is Swedish a viable alternative?

Again, the answer is maybe. Swedish-speaking Finns will try and sell it to you that Swedish is an official language, at the very same level than Finnish. You can totally live with Swedish language, yay! Don’t believe them. However, you shouldn’t trash the idea. Again, you should make a careful evaluation of your needs and plans.
– Swedish language is way easier (less stress, less time, less money)
– Swedish language skill are useful also in Sweden
– the community of Swedish-speaking Finns is tight and they tend to be more sensitive to the struggles of immigrants, being themselves a minority. In that group, everyone knows everyone: you have a shortcut to networking, which is essential in Finland. On the other hand, word travels fast in small communities, so abandon your hopes for discretion.
– being it an official language, communication in public offices or services is always offered in Swedish as well.

I warmly recommend this All Points North podcast episode to explore this alternative more in depth.

In case you wanna give Finnish a try…

The silver lining to the obsession of integration actors with Finnish language is that you will have all opportunities to do so if you wish to. Integration plans sponsor immigrants who want to give it a try. There are all sorts of courses: intensive, regular, even courses aimed at parents taking care of their children at home. This website collects Finnish courses all over Finland. The best in Helsinki are those offered by the Language Centre. The summer university also offers some. There are Finnish language cafes (kielikahvila) to help train speaking skills.

While this post may sound disillusioned and at points bitter, my main message is: choose the integration path that is best for you. Having children may influence your decision. Or things may change and you can revisit it later. To date, foreigners in Finland are pushed to learn the language indiscriminately of who they are, what they plan, what lifestyle they have. I hope these information will empower some to make informed and personal decisions when it comes to integration.

The post Should Expat Parents in Finland Learn Finnish? appeared first on The Elephant Mum.

My guest today is Kasia aka Kathy, who is currently living in Copenhagen, Denmark with her family, she is the founder of Active Action a company that facilitates workshops for Expat spouses/partners and provides consulting services. Kathy is also a writer and contributes on a regular basis to The International Denmark.

Kasia  was born in Poland, and due to very difficult times in the 80’s her parents decided to leave their homeland and go to USA. There, Kasia spent her formative years until her twenties when she decided  to go back to Poland, which she never really left behind. While living and working In Poland, she met her husband, who interestingly comes from a culturally blended family. Kasia moved to Denmark, where they settled and started a family.  Kasia’s  journey is a fascinating example of exploration of cultures as well as self-determination.

Can you share an overview of your background?

I was born in Poland, my parents are both Polish. Life just takes us on all these journeys. For my parents, it was what happened in Poland: the political changes and life itself made them think about what they wanted for their family. That, took us on a journey first to Germany and then to the United States as political refugees. From the age of 10 to 23 I lived in Chicago. I always felt a very strong tie to Poland, it was really, really such strong pull I had. Maybe it was because I had good memories as a child, I was very close with my grandparents. Because we started moving around when I was a child,  I am a Cross Cultural Adult, a Re-pat and an Expat, all in one.

You were in Germany for how long?

It was a year and a half, but I was very lucky in the sense of schools and teachers that I met. In Germany, I went to a special class for international kids. It was a small class, about 20 of us, with all sorts of international backgrounds. We had a great teacher, her job was to teach us German so that we could actually enter the German schools. I learned German in less than a year. When I found out that I could go to a German school, we got our visas and we moved to the US. Once again I had to start all over…

How did your family communicate?

My parents were quite strict with speaking Polish. When I became fluent in English I thought, this is great, now I can speak it also at home. My parents said no no no. They kept Polish as the family language. I’m very thankful because I had friends whose parents were more lenient  and left the mother tongue language behind to practice English. This of course had consequences.

My parents were very good about giving me a strong cultural base. We kept to our Polish traditions for example, celebrating the holidays in a traditional way. It wasn’t easy because our family was back in Poland, and for a long time the holidays were almost a sad thing. We couldn’t visit because at that time communism was raging in Poland. If we were to go back, we wouldn’t be able to leave again. I think all of us felt nostalgia and missed our families so, we often celebrated holidays like Christmas and Easter with other Polish families.

Did your friends belong to multicultural families or were they well rooted in the American identity?

It was mixed, American as well as some first generation kids. I had 2 very, very good friends who were also Polish. Then I had some Mexican and German friends who were first generation. For them it was it was similar since they were speaking Spanish at home, ate Mexican food, celebrated different holidays.

The United States allowed me to experience so many cultures and religion. I am grateful for growing up with such a diverse group of friends. I was always very proud of my traditions and my background.

When you were 23, you went back to Poland. Why?

When I finished high school, I wasn’t sure about what I wanted to do in life. Initially, I was interested in becoming a physical therapist, there was an opportunity to study physical therapy in Poland and after obtaining the degree go back to the United States. That was the original plan, but then my dad fell sick and after a while my parents decided to move back to Poland for him to easily access medical care.

It would be about a year before they could move away from US. In the meantime, I decided to change my studies and  pursued Cultural Studies in Poland.

When you moved to Poland, did you find yourself proficient in Polish? Speaking Polish at home compared to the university vocabulary must have been different, was it hard?

It was my first huge challenge. I remember when I stepped into the university speaking to my new colleagues was fine. But we went into a class and it was called the Sociology of Culture. The professor started speaking, and I thought, I don’t understand anything. I remember that I was actually trying to take the notes in English because at that time I was more comfortable with academic language in English. I thought, Oh my gosh, what am I going to do? I bought myself a Polish – Polish dictionary and I spent so much time just preparing and going over notes. I had friends that would help me out and they would give me their notes. The first year of my studies was a big struggle. I had to focus a lot on filling this gap.

You were studying in Poland, what happened next?

While studying, I started working. I was able to do a lot of translations, working as an interpreter. I found out there was a school for translators where you could get a diploma and become a certified translator. I was studying two different things at the same time, while doing a bit of work on the side. When I got my Master degrees in Cultural Studies and as a certified translator, I was hired as a teacher. This was another challenge because it was not something I had done before. My first teaching job was at a big corporation, a Portuguese company that had opened a chain of stores in Poland. I really enjoyed teaching and working with people. Later, I opened my own business, teaching corporate English. I was very busy and worked long hours. I had a nice apartment, I had a nice social life, but I was alone. And, you know, when you put it out there things happen. I met my Danish husband in Poland shortly after. Things happened quite fast, we were pretty sure that we wanted to be together. It was difficult because his background is in construction, engineering and architecture. For him to be in Poland would have been very difficult because he would have to know the Polish building laws and speak fluent Polish. We thought that it would be better if I moved to Denmark and that’s what we did. And it was the hardest thing ever.

How come?

Well, first and foremost I had a lot of expectations. Looking back, they were not at all realistic. I think it was typical and something many internationals/expats struggle with. The first year, we travelled back and forth – the joys of a long distance relationship. You never get a clear picture of everyday life when you are in a holiday mode. The reality was very different from my expectations.

We started our lives in Odense, the third largest city in Denmark. However, 10 years ago this city was very different from what it is today. Back then, there was not a lot of interest in the Internationals and what they were struggling with. It was tough and I felt alone. Through Danish classes I was able to meet some wonderful friends. I also decided to study in Odense because I felt completely burnt out and wanted to do something for myself. Studying in Denmark was great, but I did not meet as many people as I hoped. My fellow students were a bit younger and in a different place in their lives.

The most difficult time came around when I finished studies and I started looking for work. I was looking for a specific job that would fit, my basic knowledge of Danish, my qualifications and was in the city where I was living. When I arrived in Denmark, I went from working all the time to my husband being the sole breadwinner. This was a drastic change that made me feel like I was not contributing. Living in a new country with a new language – not an easy one is hard. When you add to it unemployment , it gets even more tricky.

When I started looking for work, I thought it would be easy: I was highly educated, had experience and spoke a few languages. It was probably a year and a half of trying to find work. I went through all the whys. Why don’t they want to hire me? What’s wrong with me? What am I doing wrong? I mean, it was a very negative mindset, and I was heading for severe depression. Then my husband and I came to a conclusion that we would give it six months, and if I didn’t get hired we would move to Poland. Sometimes, we have to look at things in a different perspective.

I started to apply for a lot of different jobs and actually started listening to the advice people were giving me. They told me I was doing things “the Polish way”. Some people told me to visit potential workplaces in person. The first one I went to, I got an interview right away. In the end I landed a job, which I had not held previously, but I had the skills that were needed for this position. I think it is important to be aware that as expats we often have to step out of our comfort zones. I began working as a Marketing Specialist in an International company. I was very happy to finally be employed. So much so, that I was willing to commute to the other side of Denmark. We eventually moved, so that both of us had  the same commuting distance in different directions. I was there for over 2 years, and then I got pregnant. When my year of maternity leave was coming to an end, I started feeling like I didn’t want to go back to work. So I gave up the job that I searched for so long. I stayed home with my daughter for three years. While I was on maternity leave I founded an international moms’ group. I really wanted to have other women who are internationals around me. I felt a need to have like minded women who could relate to one another, discuss raising kids, what challenges we were going through, especially as expats without family support.

When we signed our daughter up for preschool, my husband received a job offer in Copenhagen. His parents live there, and we thought it was a good time to make a transition. Once again, It was my time again to think about what I would like to do. What a gift, to be able to find something you love and call it work.  I knew I wanted to be my own boss again and I wanted to help other internationals so, I founded Active Action.

What does Active Action do exactly?

Active Action supports companies, organisations and institutions in order to increase attraction and specifically retention. Through our workshops, programs and consultations we provide the tools which enable Internationals, their employers and communities to find mutual understanding and solutions. Active Action is all about smoother transitions, acknowledgement, raising cultural awareness and providing solutions for each International and their families, for the employers and employees, for the municipalities and organisations welcoming newcomers.

Basically, Active Action is all about supporting Expat Spouses/Partners so that they have smoother transitions into a new host country and that they obtain the tools and knowledge to lead thriving lives abroad.

When you do the workshops, who are your customers?

My customers range from international companies, universities that hire large amounts expats and internationals to municipalities and embassies. I also provide consulting services.

Going back to your family, what languages do you speak at home?

My husband and I speak English to each other. My husband speaks Danish to our daughter and I speak Polish to her. I understand Danish and my husband has taken Polish classes, he understands most of what I say. Understanding one another’s mother tongue is a huge advantage and this way no one is ever excluded from conversations.

You are native in two languages. Did it make it easier for you to learn Danish? Does it affect the way you express yourself?

Take for example my name. When I came to Denmark, I would use my Polish name but people would just butcher it with the worst pronunciations. I started using my American name, which is Kathy, much easier. But honestly, when people ask me, I say you can choose whichever you want, they are parallel for me. I feel like I have a split personality because I feel equally comfortable in both. My whole life I was kind of two people, my Polish self at home, with my family, but then I also always had the international me, when using English.

Learning Danish as an adult was actually quite difficult. I don’t have any difficulty expressing myself in English and Polish, now Danish is a different story…

Overall, would you say being raised in a multicultural environment was an asset for you? Why?

Growing up in a multicultural environment was one of the greatest gifts I have received in my life. It has shaped me into the person I am today. It made me interested in different cultures, languages, cuisines, travel and people. I also learned to communicate, be friends with, work with and live among various nations and religions. I am open, tolerant and respectful of people and curious about the world. I think it was wonderful to grow up and have friends from all over the world. I think that is partially the reason why I live abroad myself. Now, my husband and I are able to give this gift to our daughter.

No doubt Kasia will be up for the challenge of helping expat spouses integrating in the Danish job market, thanks to her personal experience, professional expertise, and incredible drive. Once again, it’s inspiring to witness the openness that derives from getting to know new places and cultures. If you want to follow Kasia’s work and story, like Active Action Facebook page or follow her on Instagram.

The post Growing up in a multicultural family. Parallel identities: Kasia’s story appeared first on The Elephant Mum.

#1. A library at every corner

Espoo City Library includes 18 units, all throughout City of Espoo. In practice, this means that almost every neighbourhood has a library available. Together with the delivery service (see below), this translates in everyone in town being able to easily access culture and library services.

#2. Free delivery

Every item can be delivered to the library of your choice. Espoo City Library shares its collection with Helsinki, Vantaa, and Kaunianen under the Helmet network. A user can search a title through the Helmet website, book it and request that it’s delivered to the closest library unit. After a couple of days, you get an email that your book is ready to for pick-up. All free of charge!

#3. Books ain’t the only thing you can borrow

The library in Finland doesn’t include only books. You can borrow music, videogames, dvds, blue-rays, ebooks, boardgames. The list goes on: you can borrow even working tools or digital cameras. I went to the library to sew my curtains with a sewing machine, all for free!

#4. It’s a safe place

I am an immigrant in Finland and the library is one of very few places where I feel welcome and completely at ease. Everyone, even tourists, can enter the Espoo City Library. The library is not just a book archive: it’s a place where to meet with your friends, have a chat, go to events, spend time with your family. Some libraries are located within malls, others have a cafeteria, and while they are generally quiet places, there’s no strict silence rule.

#5. It’s multilingual and international

The library has a huge role in allowing our family to cultivate bilingualism. Their collection of Italian books makes it possible for me to read to my kids and develop their language skills. Espoo City Library has children books in plenty of languages, actually. The adults collection includes several books in languages other than Finnish or Swedish. 90% of my own reads are borrowed from the library and I regularly find movies there too.

#6. Open at (almost) all hours

Most libraries are open during weekends and after working hours. In several, it’s possible to let yourself in also after opening hours thanks to your personal library card and a scan reader. Checking items in and out is completely handled by machines and you can return items at virtually every hour.

#7. A space for children to play

Most library units have a play corner for small children. The Entresse library has a play room and a collection of costumes to play dress-up. Sello Library has a play corner with toys, paper and pencils, and even a microwave to warm up baby meals. It’s actually very common to meet up with other parents at the library, let the children freely play, and alternate with book reading. Children books are easy to access (no high shelves) and the smart archiving system makes it easy to tidy up afterwards. Older kids often meet and play videogames at the library on the consoles and computers available.

#8. Plenty of space for events

Espoo City Library has a lot of space for events and a rich programme for all ages. There are stages, as well as rooms for musicians to record or play. There’s a film editing lab. There are meeting rooms. You can attend children’s events, concerts, book clubs, language cafes. The library has always a space to offer (for free in most or all cases). It’s a true cultural hub and a great resource for the community.

#9. Great user interface

Items are smartly tagged and easy to find through the Helmet website. There are several search filters, for example collection or language. This is how I easily find new reads or movies in Italian language for my kids. Most books are archived with a cover picture. All relevant information are listed in the description. Users are notified via email of upcoming deadlines or items ready for pick-up. Through the app Taskukirjasto keep your holds and loans in check. Fines can be paid online. It’s so user-centered!

#10. The library belongs to the community

Overall, I appreciate how the library is built on trust and sharing. As I mentioned, libraries are accessible outside of opening hours. Spaces are easy to rent. There’s an underlying sense of inclusion and participation. The library is a common resource and we all hold the responsibility of taking care of it, enriching it with events and our participation, and valuing the services it provides.

Espoo City Library is an enriching part of our daily life as parents, expats, and individuals. It’s a fantastic resource for people living in Espoo. I hope you found interesting ideas in this post if you live outside of Finland. Congrats to my library for this incredible achievement!

If you liked this post, you may appreciate also:
Challenge accepted, Helmet! (The Reading Challenge 2018)
My 10 Best Children’s Books About Feelings
The Best Christmas Gift, a personalised book by Wonderbly

The post 10 Reasons Why Espoo City Library Is Awesome appeared first on The Elephant Mum.

Methods and available resources vary if your child is in school age (7+ years) or younger. As far as I know there are no conclusive studies regarding the cut-off age of the critical phase of language learning – that is, the years when a child has high likelihood to learn a language at native level. Some studies children should start before age 5, others say 7, some even age 18. However, all agree that early exposure facilitates a child to learn. As a personal observation, I want to add that younger children are socially more relaxed, there is no social tension with their peers, no shame or embarrassment, so they allow themselves to make more mistakes and learn faster; beside that, early introduction allows children to explore more contexts where a language is used: we use different vocabularies in different contexts and with children according to their ages. Long story short, the earlier you introduce your child to Finnish (or any other language), the better. Whatever solutions you adopt, remember language learning is learned mostly through social interaction and not passive exposure.

Tips for younger children

Young children are the easiest customers. They usually enjoy every option you offer them and Finland has plenty of family events and workshops. Here’s some ideas of places and activities where your child can train her Finnish language skills.

Explore the local community

Where do Finnish stay-at-home parents spend their days? The answer is the local common houses. In the capital area, almost every neighbourhood has one. You can check out your town’s website and look up the keywords: asukaspuisto (“neighbourhood house”), avoin päiväkoti (“open daycare”), leikkipuisto (“playground”. This word denotes both simple open air playgrounds as well as common houses like asukaspuisto). In these places children roam and play safely, while mothers have a chat and a cup of coffee. They are also great places to meet other parents living close by. Don’t be shy of asking people their contact to plan playdates: Finnish people rarely make the first move at socialising but are happy to connect with other parents. MLL has also a special programme to facilitate this.

Family coffee meetups

The family association MLL plans nationwide regular meetings called perhekahvila (“family cafe”) open to all parents. Here’s the official page of the events; if you don’t find which is the closest gathering, do not hesitate to contact MLL! They are really happy to help parents building support networks. These meetings are also a great chance to socialise with Finnish parents and later organise playdates.

Library events

Finnish libraries are way more than book storage units, they are social and cultural hubs. Most libraries have regular and free-of-charge events for children, a popular one being the satuhetki, where books are read aloud to children. If you live in the capital area, you can check family events at this link, selecting “lasten ja nuorten tapahtumat” (“events for children and kids“). Pro-tip: use the Finnish page because Finnish events are not listed in the English one.

Music class

Music classes for children are popular in Finland, even as young as babies. You can look them up by searching for muskari. Music schools offer courses, but you may find one free-of-charge at the local church (they welcome people of all faiths) or in your local leikkipuisto or asukaspuisto. It’s a great parent-child activity as well!

Baby parks (kerho)

Kerho is some sort of daycare organised by the town. It’s meant for children over 2 years old who don’t attend daycare yet. When E was younger, I sent him to the local one to later ease up his introduction into daycare and it worked great. Children attend kerho 4-6 hours / week while their carer gets some well-deserved respite. An additional benefit of kerho is also that the child is introduce to the same routines and vocabulary that she’ll experience later in a Finnish daycare.

Daycare

This is the easiest solution: apply for a spot in a Finnish daycare! A child can attend daycare part-time as well as full-time. In Espoo daycares have standard programmes to enhance Finnish learning in bilingual children. Teachers and carers teach children Finnish through games and constant practice, and then report the progress to parents. My children learned Finnish quickly and very well thanks to the efforts of their carers!

Tips for school-age kids

I will admit older kids are not my expertise, since mine are still young. If you are reading this post and have suggestions to add to this section, by all means leave a comment and I’ll be glad to add them here.

Social life and hobbies

Nothing motivates kids like the wish to belong to a community. Depending on the age of your kid, you may have more or less influence on their social life. Be the first to encourage them to have Finnish friends. Hobbies are a great way to gently expose them to their peers speaking Finnish once or twice a week. Don’t be afraid that they won’t follow instructions and feel left out: I’m a sleep-deprived adult and I’ve been able to follow all kind of classes in Finnish even before speaking it. It may take time, but they will adapt.

Parent-child hobby classes

This requires some sacrifice on your side, but taking a hobby class with your kid can be a great way to spend quality time and a spectacular excuse to expose her (and yourself) to Finnish language. There are all sorts of courses offered in the Helsinki area on Ilmonet and they are very cheap: cooking, crafting, workout classes… everything you can think of, you can find.

Events

Libraries (see above) offer events for all ages, so it’s worth checking them out. Beside that, there are constantly events for families or kids advertised on Facebook. You can look up also cultural hubs (kultturikeskus) and their seasonal programmes. Check our also Lippu.fi or TicketMaster.fi for all kind of events.

Youth centres

Some neighbourhoods are provided with small centres for young people called nuorisotalo. There may be regular and free-of-charge events organised there, like “girls’ cafe” where young girls can meet up, or videogame competitions, and much more.

I hope this list of ideas will help you introduce your child to Finnish language and help you integrate here in Finland!

The post How to Introduce Your Child to Finnish language – a crash guide for expat parents in Finland appeared first on The Elephant Mum.

The list includes 25 books and I will write five posts throughout the year with our selection of children’s books. Our family reads in Finnish and Italian language, but some of our picks are in English and I translate on the fly. Beside the link to the HelMet (our library network) archive, whenever possible I’ll include the link to the same books in other languages to make sure you can enjoy them as well. If you’ll find my recommendations valuable, let me know in the comments below.  The year is almost over and so will be this series. If you wanna peek at my other recommendations, check out my previous posts: first, second, and third.

#16. Someone goes to school in the book

HelMet (ENG) | ENG
Even though it’s not the central topic of the book, this challenge gives me a chance to introduce you to a brilliant book which R, now 5, greatly appreciated: It’s hard to be five. R is a very compliant child (wish her little brother would try to imitate that) and I thought this book may give her space and words to express how she feels. I was totally right! She asked me to read it time after time! The story is narrated in first person by a new 5 year old. He has a baby brother and complains about the changes that took over after he turned five. For instance, why he has to walk anywhere, while his brother gets carried on a stroller? Why can’t he get dirty like in good ol’ times? It’s so tough to act responsible, he doesn’t feel small anymore and he’s not all ready to grow up. R went through a similar phase few weeks ago and I’m so glad I found this book for her! Authors Jamie Lee Curtis and Laura Cornell have published several successful books, mostly based on relationship and empowerment for children. You should check them out!

#17. Someone gets out of trouble in the book

HelMet (ENG) | ENG
When someone says trouble, I always think of Curious George! My kids love the animation series and I thought reading a book would be fun. In Curious George and the Pizza Party, George gets invited to a pizza party at a friend’s. He’s too impatient to bake his own pizza and while no one’s looking… well, the outcome is quite a parent’s nightmare, but George is as cute as ever and like every time he puts all the effort to solve the tricky situation. My nickname for E is “monkey” and between his small round head and his attraction for trying to execute his unconventional ideas, E is my little Curious George. We often joke about it in our house. E truly enjoys to watch George think and get out of trouble.

#18. The book cover has a vehicle on it

HelMet (FI)  | HelMet (SVE)| FI | ENG
We are in full “Fireman Sam’s phase” here, so we had to choose Paloauto Rientää Hätiin (English version: Fire Truck is Flashing). This was E’s favourite book in this batch and I’m pretty confident I can recite it by heart even if we read it in Finnish. In the story a fire breaks out in a city building and the fox firemen get ready, drive to the place, and save the day. There are other books in this series Busy Wheels by Mandy Archer, so if your child is more into ambulances, tractors, or spaceships, they’ll find the right book.

#19. The book has a pet in it

HelMet (ENG) | ENG
We recently got a cat and, as a natural consequence, the kids lost interest in our guinea pigs. I thought this challenge would be a nice opportunity to help them reconnect with our other pets and I found this lovely series called Zoe and Beans. We picked the story Hello Oscar. Zoe is a curious girl, Beans’ her inseparable dog friend. One day, they find a guinea pig in the garden… then another… then a turtle. What’s going on?
A perfect book for 3-5 years old, with big nice illustrations and not much text. Right away we ordered three new books of Zoe and Beans!

#20. The book is connected to a game

HelMet (ENG) | ENG
Being a geek, I had hoped to find some toddlers’ book connected to a videogame, but no way. We went more classic with Maisy Plays Football by Lucy Cousins. The Maisy series (Maisy was translated to Maisa in Finnish) is a classic in our house. The stories are perfect for 2-5 year olds and I love the colourful and simple pictures. There’s a book for every milestone: going to daycare, spending the night at a friend’s, going to the movies… but also stories about daily life and playing with friends. If you haven’t read any Maisy’s book, you definitely should!

The year is almost over and so will be this series soon. Stay tuned for the last post, the very last batch of books. It’s been so much fun to discover new books and watch my kids grow and appreciate new stories. If you have book recommendations, I’d love to hear them out: drop me a line down in the comments. Until next time :).

The post The Reading Challenge 2018, part IV appeared first on The Elephant Mum.

I spoke about our adoption story, as well as the struggles we faced after our son came home (my slides can be found here). I was pleased to hear that it’s become fairly common for Finnish municipalities to offer or sponsor adoption counselling in English, but we still lack information, events, resources, and peer support for families who don’t speak Finnish fluently.

After the event, I was encouraged to start an English-speaking community for adoptive families living in Finland. I don’t want any other family to find themselves in the situation we faced, all alone with no idea where to turn for help or support. I want to make a case that families like mine, where no parent speaks Finnish fluently, are even more vulnerable. There are several reasons for this:

• expat families don’t have family support available;
• immigrants always live at the margins of society. We never are in the eye of information flow, we don’t have easy access to newspapers, and are not aware of many services;
• professional support is always limited by language barriers. It’s hard for Finnish speaking adoptive families to get support, let alone if you add the restriction of finding an English speaking professional.

Finland is small, adoptive families are few, and international adoptive families are even less. This is why my starting point was creating a Facebook group to gather families who need or are willing to speak English. The objectives of the group are:

• to provide a first layer of peer support to adoptive families in Finland,
• to improve the information flow in English language regarding adoption and adoptive parenting,
• to plan and organise events in English language for adoptive families or waiting adoptive parents.

I plan to work closely with Adoptioperheet. I don’t want the group to become a reason for international adoptive families to be further cut out from the local adoption community. On the contrary, I’m hoping to fill the gaps that language barriers have created and facilitating connection.

If you are an adoptive parent living in Finland, there’s much you can do to help this initiative:

• join the Facebook group and help me advertise it;
• suggest or plan events and resources that you feel can be useful for adoptive families;
• volunteer to translate from Finnish/Swedish to English existing materials on Adoptioperheet’s website.

You can download, share, and print this flyer and pin it to your local Neuvola clinic, library, any relevant place:

English-speaking adoptive families in Finland are a tiny minority and we need all available help to make sure no adoptive family is left alone.

The post Kickstarting support in English language for adoptive families in Finland appeared first on The Elephant Mum.

I was lucky to find a great read to get prepared on the issue. I didn’t need to know all about multilingualism, I just wanted some practical advice on how to teach them well, what common issues to expect or prevent, and resources. Annika Bourgogne’s book “Be bilingual – Practical advice for multilingual families” gave me exactly that. I was also very pleased to read that at the time of writing, Annika – already mother to two bilingual daughters – was in the process of international adoption. She was sensitive to the matter and included a very useful section on preserving your international adopted child’s language.

Annika has a very interesting profile. She’s worked as a language researcher and wrote her thesis on raising bilingual children. At the same time, she’s herself mother of bilingual children speaking French and Finnish. While reading the book I felt her background contributed to creating a reliable source supported by real-life experience.

The book starts with an overview of current theories about multilingualism and its impact on the child’s brain. I liked that, even though it’s a short summary of years of research, the author doesn’t presents only results she supports, but keeps it honest and introduces also different beliefs on the same topic. She beautifully compressed tons of research in a handful of sections, replying to the most common questions, such as, can a child be trilingual and what’s the impact on her development, how does the brain develop with several languages spoken around, is it best to introduce both languages at the same time or in a sequence, and so on. I felt she tackled any question I ever had! Annika organised the book in a clear structure, separating scientific results from practical advice.

I especially loved the sections talking about cultural identity and language. I feel the topic very close to my family, both as an expat and as an adoptive mother. Bilingualism was a worrying issue while we were waiting for our adoption match. I feared it could be too much for a child with special needs. In our case it was not much of a choice: Italian is the family language and the outside world speaks Finnish. While reading this book, I thought that if we would have been in a monolingual situation, I definitely would have considered preserving my son’s native language, in addition to the community language.

The author ends the book with some chapters full of practical ideas for kids of all ages. One core concept is that children hardly learn an additional language in class, but through meaningful interactions. This can mean playing with parents or peers, as well as engaging in an interesting activity – reading a magazine, playing a videogame, and so on. The hardest challenge is to evolve your way of stimulating your child, according to her age or preferences. Annika offers tons of suggestions – I mean, even a long bullet list at the end of the book – and I treasured them all.

To conclude, this is a book I warmly recommend to any multicultural family and even to any family who would consider teaching an additional language to their kids from a young age. Let me know what you think about it in the comments section.

The post Book review of “Be bilingual” appeared first on The Elephant Mum.